Monmen: Monica Meneghetti's Blog: Bridging

Lately I'm glimpsing how pervasive fluidity is, how very deep is life's non-dual nature. I am no different. More than ever, I am both here and there, urban and rural, secular and spiritual, right and wrong. I am spiraling upwards and downwards at any given time, succumbing to entropy and striving for order, simultaneously.

Trying to make things into absolutes causes so much turmoil in this world. The either/or mindset failed to help me in my sexual identity, and it fails so often when applied to anything else.

So why do I repeatedly fall into the trap of choosing, or believing, or being this or that?

My way of being challenges others' binary-ness, their preconceptions of duality, their fundamentalism. Witnessing their discomfort, out of compassion I soothe them by attempting to be more black-and-white in my words and deeds. But that isn't easier on me; it goes against my spirit.

My spirit's way is the way of the bridge: resting firmly on both shores, dwelling on both as well as in between them and over the river, simultaneously. I dance across the bridge and over the river, pausing for a time on one bank or another until exploration beckons and I resume the dance of in-between. I live and I love in the places where binaries meet and caress, bump and rub together.

At last, I have understood: whenever, for the benefit of others, I force myself to align with society's embrace of the binary, I do myself harm. Perhaps I also harm others, by perpetuating a mindset that leads to conflict.

So now I am learning how to live in harmony with my nature (and perhaps the nature of all things.) I will practice allowing others grapple with their own dissonance rather than violating my self. I will practice being proud of what my way of being can bring to the world: diversity, inclusiveness, understanding - and maybe even some peace, at least for myself.